The Wisdom of Saying Nothing
I once spent ten minutes trying to convince someone that I didn’t look at them weird.
It wasn’t a serious conversation. At least, it shouldn’t have been. But somehow I found myself explaining my angle of vision, the lighting, and what I meant with my eyes (which, to be clear, were just trying to stay open at the end of a long day). I probably would’ve submitted security footage if I had it.
And all for what?
To prove that my face, in that moment, had been innocent.
It sounds ridiculous, but here’s the thing: we do this all the time.
We over-explain. Over-clarify. We waste energy proving we’re not who someone assumed we were. Because being misunderstood feels like a tiny injustice, and our pride can’t stand the silence.
Dale Carnegie once said the best way to win an argument is to avoid it. And honestly, if you’ve ever tried winning one with a tired toddler or a well-rested adult with internet access, you already know he was onto something.
But this isn’t about “staying above the drama.” It’s about learning the difference between having a voice and always using it. Because sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is absolutely nothing.
Jesus Didn’t Manage Perception
There’s this moment in Matthew’s Gospel that should be framed in every leader’s office.
Jesus is standing in front of Pilate. The crowd is hostile. The air is thick. False accusations are being tossed like popcorn. And Pilate is waiting for Him to say something: to fight back, to plead His case, to explain Himself.
Instead, Jesus says… nothing.
No rebuttal. No damage control. No nervous over-explaining.
Matthew writes, “Jesus made no reply—not even to a single charge—to the great amazement of the governor.”
It wasn’t passive. It wasn’t indifference. It was discipline.
He knew that silence isn’t always surrender. Sometimes it’s a sign you’ve got nothing left to prove.
Jesus wasn’t trying to win the moment. He was walking out of something bigger. And He trusted that the truth would do its job, just not always on our timeline.
Your Peace Is Too Expensive to Keep Spending on Arguments
The temptation to defend yourself will show up often. Especially if you’re building something real.
You’ll be misunderstood. Questioned. Criticized. People will assign motives to you that you’ve never even thought of, and then ask you to explain them.
You’ll want to correct the record.
But here’s the hard truth: most of the time, you’re correcting it for people who aren’t even reading carefully.
At some point, you realize your peace is worth more than being right.
You don’t need to fire off a thread. You don’t need to “set the story straight.” You don’t need to prove to strangers that your heart was in the right place.
You just need to stay aligned. Keep doing the work. Let your life make the case.
Jesus didn’t hustle for approval. And He certainly didn’t let misunderstanding steer His mission.
You don’t have to either.
Let Silence Say What Words Can’t
This doesn’t mean avoid every conversation. It doesn’t mean shut down when conflict comes.
But it does mean being wise enough to know when silence holds more truth than a perfectly worded response.
We live in a time where everyone is expected to say something about everything, all the time. And when you don’t, people assume you’re hiding, or guilty, or uninterested. But Jesus shows us that you can be fully present and completely quiet. That silence can be an act of strength, not weakness.
That sometimes, the pressure to speak is just another version of fear.
And choosing not to answer every accusation isn’t giving up, it’s growing up.
So the next time you’re being misunderstood, misquoted, or mildly accused of a suspicious eyebrow, you have permission to take a breath. To listen. To smile if you want.
And to say nothing.
Because not every version of you floating around needs a rebuttal.
You’ve got more important things to carry than everyone’s opinion of your face.
There’s power in stillness.
And sometimes, the most faithful sound you’ll make is silence.
At Brightide, we’re creating space for Christian professionals to grow with integrity, not noise. If you’re tired of the pressure to prove yourself and ready to live with purpose, clarity, and quiet strength, join the movement.
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